Imagine a garden. There is such a beautiful variety of colour, shape and size. Some blooms have been recently planted. Others are well established. They are the elders of the garden. Each plant relies on those around them to thrive. The connections between them are often unseen as they happen below the surface of the soil. The soil needs to be rich with nutrients for healthy roots and the plant needs adequate sunshine, water and protection to grow. These are the outer influences on the plant’s ability to thrive.

A loving gardener tends to the garden. Adding nutrients such as fertilizer and water, pruning off parts of the plant that have decayed and removing weeds that compete with the plant for growth. In time, each plant has the potential to thrive and perhaps it flowers. Gaining strength from the tender loving care and attention it receives.

As the garden matures, the gardener strikes new plants from the healthiest ones. The fledgling plants may stay within the same garden bed as their ‘parent’ or join another garden bed. New plants are brought in from the nursery to add diversity.

Where flowers bloom, so does hope.

Lady Bird Johnson.

The analogy of the garden mirrors our relationship with each other and the world around us. Each of us have been planted in a particular location or ‘garden bed’. We rely on both the other plants around us and on external factors in order to thrive. No plant survives long if it is on its own. Just as plants in the garden, we are interconnected and rely on each other for support and cohesion.

How can we bloom in our particular bed of the garden?

Compassion – both for others and ourselves. The whole community flourishes if we are aware of the needs of individuals and also the impact we can have supporting each other particularly with the most vulnerable. Compassion also needs to be extended to ourselves. Ensuring we have the right nutrients of well-being to flourish. I have seen some beautiful examples of how individuals and groups are supporting their communities – voluntary work, donations to organizations who support those in crisis or need, connection with neighbours, street pantries.

Advocacy – With courage and clarity we can speak on behalf of or in support of other people. Raising issues and giving a voice to the needs of marginalized groups who may be overlooked for recognition or specific support.

Teamwork – Balancing our own needs with consideration for the needs of the whole community. Checking if our individual actions or perspectives have a negative impact on the welfare of others. Working together to build a culture that ensures everyone’s needs and well-being are met and enhanced. Those needs can be as basic as the safety and physiological needs (clean air, water and food) for each individual, to the creation of social networks of belonging and ensuring pathways to continued personal growth and learning. Asking ‘Is this for the greater good?’, ‘Am I supporting this whole garden/community to thrive?’

Next time you are out in a garden, imagine the connection and support each plant is playing in creating the whole. As members of our communities we can help each other bloom. By providing the tender loving care of compassion, advocacy and teamwork we can make something beautiful.

While parts of our country are being asked to stay at home, a physical distance has been created between us and those we love. We have found ourselves in newly created bubbles of separation.

Grandparents separated from their adult children and grandchildren. Friends no longer visit our homes. The venues we once took for granted – coffee shops, restaurants, movie theatres, gyms and entertainment venues closed for the foreseeable future. Our usual group exercise and activities stalled. Children now see the adults around them wearing masks. I wonder what they are making of this altered world. A world where the latest word on a four year old’s lips is ‘lock down’. Even as adults we are finding it difficult to process the changes that have occurred.

For many of us, we have come to accept that this is our present way of life, yet the future remains uncertain. As humans, we were built for connection. Our current times are definitely testing our natural state of being. We are grieving the physical touch, hugs and energy of communal gathering.

We are hardwired to connect with others, its what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering’    

Brene Brown

Yet our desire for connection with others is being heightened.

• We are looking for alternate ways to remain connected with others. The platforms and technologies that have been developed over the last few decades have become our savior in ‘staying in touch’. We can not only connect with our immediate community but also connect with friends and family around the world. Sharing both everyday moments and life milestones together.
• We are being motivated to do what is possible to end this isolation and see our loved ones again. There is nothing like the absence or unavailability of something to build our desire. The term ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ seems appropriate for the yearning we feel. We remain sustained by the possibilities of a time in the future to celebrate life together. This will not be taken for granted when it finally happens.
• We are learning new strategies to navigate our days. Finding reasons to get up in the morning in a narrowed life existence. Establishing daily routines to strengthen our well being and mentally find balance and calm. It may mean creating boundaries around how much information we allow in from the outside world and stopping to just observe the simple things – the sights, sounds and textures of the world around us. It is increasingly important to maintain meaning and stay connected in our everyday lives.

In many ways, although we have reduced our physical presence with others in life, we can stay connected. Like invisible silver threads that join us, we remain in each other’s thoughts, memories and awareness. We all look forward to a time when we can spend more time physically together. Until then its important to use the ways available to us now to stay in touch.